Computer Woes

I had a very scary moment yesterday when I thought my computer had died and I was going to lose everything on my hard drive. I think I've sorted the problem out now though, although I still want to back everything up and do a fresh install of everything just to clear up any problems that might still be lurking.

My New Year's plans have magically come together in the last ten minutes. It looks like I'll be driving to Toronto tomorrow and picking up Joel on the way, and then ringing in 2005 in the big city with Chris Collins and Co. Should be fun.

Back Downtown

After nearly a week at my parents' place, I'm back at my house downtown. Sure, it's lonely and cold, but at least I can eat my own food, use my computer, and make noise after 10 pm when my dad normally goes to bed. I need the freedom, and that's more important to me than the company. Besides which, "the company" was just my parents, and I was beginning to feel the generation gap. Tomorrow I'm probably going to finally see some of my Kingston friends finally (i.e. my friends from Kingston who don't go to Queen's), so that will break up the boredom a bit.

Belated merry Christmas, by the way! My holiday was great. My sister got me these awesome noise-reducing earbud headphones, to replace my iPod headphones, which got wrecked. And I got a few books to read; I'm going to try and get through as much pleasure reading as possible before January 10th when classes start and I have to set aside interesting books until April.

Music: John Frusciante - Will to Death

The Home Front

I've moved back to my parents' place for Christmas now. I don't think I'll stay long though. Don't get me wrong: it's not my parents. I get along really well with my parents and I enjoy hanging out with them most of the time. It's the little things that make it impossible to live here. For starters, there's something about this house that makes my eyes itch. Then there's the computer, which is still the same one that we bought in grade 10. Seven years old is positively ancient in computer years, and it's on it's last legs. I feel so out of touch if I don't have access to the Internet all the time. And the food: while I appreciate not having to prepare food for myself, and I appreciate that it's mostly better than food I would prepare for myself, I also appreciate the fact that if I eat this way for the whole three weeks I'm going to be fat at the end of it. There are a million other little things like that too. Bottom line: come Boxing Day, I'm moving back downtown.

Crappy universities want me!

I got a letter today from the York University School of Graduate Studies trying to recruit me for their physics department. Haha. I think I can do a bit better, thank you. They want me to go to a crappy university and study a subject I hate, and they aren't even offering me good money to do it. I need to get on my real applications soon though.

Other news: I finally gave in and watched Garden State last night, girlfriend or no. It was a pretty good movie. I hate movies like that though, because they just erode my cynicism and set me up for disappointment when no real-life relationship can possibly live up to the unrealistic standard set by Zach Braff and Natalie Portman.

Music: Iron & Wine - Our Endless Numbered Days

Brrr!

There's still a sub -30 windchill out. So much for Christmas shopping downtown, I guess. Check out this cool thing that happened to my window though!

It's a Christmas miracle! It looks way cooler in real life though.

Winter Ghetto Wasteland

The ghetto has been unnnervingly deserted today. Everyone is either finished exams and gone home, or they are busily studying for exams. The one thing they are definitely not doing is going outside; there's a -36 windchill at the moment. Since everyone else in my house has left (with the exception of Joel and Dave B. who are coming back to write exams this week, George who lives in his room all the time, and Donald, who is never home anyway--so basically, with the exception of almost everyone), I turned the heat off in the kitchen the other day. It's now so cold in there that the fridge never even turns on. In fact, I'd bet that the fridge is warmer on the inside than the outside. I've turned the heat on now though, just so the pipes don't freeze or anything.

I just remembered a really funny thing I once read on the importance of using proper capitalization. It really annoys me when people don't, and this nicely sums up why:

Proper capitalization is the difference between saying "I helped my Uncle Jack off a horse," and saying "I helped my uncle jack off a horse."

Well put.

Music: My Morning Jacket - At Dawn

Blogging the activist in me

Last night I went to a party at Paddy's place that turned out to be really lame. At one point almost everyone I knew seemed to disappear, and I found myself with most of a beer to finish before I could leave. And what was worse, I found myself sitting with a bunch of stupid conservatives talking about the WWE and how great Alberta is. I really just don't get conservatives. The vast majority of them, I believe, are just plain stupid (vis. Dubya), but for others, this is not the case (vis. my former housemate Eric, who is just about the most conservative person you'll ever meet--and who, incidentally, is from Alberta). These people tend to at least be fairly socially liberal at least, but in terms of economics and world politics, it's as if they are just incapable of seeing things from other peoples' perspectives or thinking outside their conservative box. That really doesn't do it justice; the truth is, I can't figure out how these people exist, unless they are just knowingly evil and hide it well.

In other left-wing news, I'm again reading No Logo by Naomi Klein. I got it for Christmas two years ago, and it's a really interesting book to read. It gets you thinking about how much capitalism has come to dominate all of our lives on the most personal levels of how we perceive ourselves and one another. I recommend it as a fun and interesting read, but if you want serious left-wing philosophy, there are better places to get it. For example, I recently read an excellent interview with Noam Chomsky on the topic of anarchism.

Music: M. Ward - Transfiguration of Vincent

Done!

It weren't pretty, but I'm finished! Controls was a bitch. To compound the fact that I was completely unprepared, I think it was a harder exam than everyone was expecting. I ran out of stuff I could do with an hour to go, so I left. I couldn't stand to be there any more. I pulled it off though. I won't be losing sleep over it, because although my mark might suck, it'll be well on the right side of the all-important 50% line. The effort I put into that course though...quite frankly, I'm ashamed. I probably only spent 40-45 hours on it in total (and there are supposed to be 36 hours just of lectures, plus assignments and studying!). I'm ashamed but I'm also proud that I could get away with it. *knock on wood* Ah, now for a blissful 24 day break.

Music: Elliott Smith - XO

T-minus 23 hours

It's the home stretch! In less than a day, I'll be off for Christmas and only one semester away from graduation. It's very hard to study, right now, even though I really need to. All I can think about is the great feeling I'm going to have this time tomorrow, and about the lab Christmas party on Saturday. It should be good. I think it's going to double as Joanna's farewell party, as she's moving out to B.C. to live with her fiancé while she writes up her PhD thesis. Joanna is such an awesome person. Last week when we went to the Tir Nan Og after Rouladenfest, she and I had a great conversation about grad schools and it was very inspirational for me. She's also really hot, especially for someone of her age. *wink*

Music: Elliott Smith - Roman Candle

3 down, 1 to go

Lasers is over. It wasn't too bad. 20 questions. I got probably half of the marks on the test in the first 45 minutes. I worked through the meat of it in the next hour and a half, and then I spent the last 45 minutes staring at a stupid 5 mark question (out of 70) not being able to figure it out at all. So once again, I think I can say for sure I'm in the 70s for the course. It was actually a pretty cool course, and I shook the prof's hand at the end of the exam, but I'm glad it's over. The only thing that now stands between me and a holiday booze-fest is Control Systems. In a way, I'm more worried about that one than any other course I have. Because, it's a course I should actually care about; it's actually kind of relevant to what I want to do once I'm done here. But I really hate it. And it should be easy, but I'm not good at it. I guess I have two days now to learn the course. We'll see how it goes.

Music: Jeff Buckley - Sketches (For My Sweetheart the Drunk)

Lasers, Blast!

I just found out that Weeping Tile is doing a reunion show (as they apparently do every Christmas) at AJ's tomorrow night. Unfortunately, that conflicts with my laser optics exam. Chantelle (who is a huge Sarah Harmer fan) also can't go. Exams suck. This lasers course...it's not that the material is super hard, it's just that we went so fast and covered so much! It seems like we need to know everything in way more detail than we ever covered it in order to do the kinds of problems the prof expects us to do. I guess that's what the textbook is for. I'm not really a big textbook guy though; I have probably $2000 worth of textbooks on my shelf and I've barely cracked most of them. They're very impressive looking though. Their presence in my room makes me look imposingly smart.

Music: A.C. Newman - The Slow Wonder (Again, I know, but it's such an awesome album!)

They call me the Spin Doctor

The quantum exam went well...considering my low expectations. I won't be worrying about it over Christmas, that's for sure. The important thing is that I never have to take another quantum course again. After a day of freezing rain today, the snow is really coming down right now. Snow is beautiful stuff, but much moreso at night (fortunately, perhaps, it's dark out for about 16 hours a day at this time of year). During the day, if it's snowing, it's inevitably ugly and overcast; only at night can you pretend it's not and that nature is doing its thing purely for your aesthetic benefit.

Music: The Brian Jonestown Massacre - Methodrone

I got the Quantum Mechanics Exam Blues

My head is spinning like an electron; that is to say, it's not actually spinning at all, but it seems like it's spinning. All day I've been studying madly for tomorrow's quantum exam. I still have no confidence. It's going to be one of those exams where you go in knowing you might get 90% or you might get 20%, and you might not even know which by the time you hand your paper in. It all seems to make sense, but when it comes to reproducing it, I'm doubtful that I can. Luckily, I'm sure I can get the requisite 40% just on gimme questions and bullshit.

I also have to say again how much I love the fact that not only does my Control Systems prof not speak English well, he seems to revell in the fact. I swear he turns the spell-check off in his email program just so he can show off the fact that English is not his first language. Once I went a whole lecture not knowing what he was talking about, until I eventually figured out that the word he was using was "matrix." *sigh* I'm all for equal opportunities and all, but surely being able to speak clear English is a requisite for a teaching position. I mean, you have to be Catholic to be the Pope, right? That's the one great thing the physics department has over all other departments in the faculty: all the profs speak excellent English--usually in a snobby English accent, too.

Music: The Walkmen - Everyone Who Pretended to Like Me Is Gone

War: a good way to avoid studying

My quantum mechanics exam is on Friday, and I still have a ton of studying to do. The problem is, Joel introduced me to this game Medieval Total War and it's really distracting me from studying. I'm not usually a big video game freak; other than a couple of games of multiplayer Mario Kart and the occasional round of Solitaire on the computer, I haven't touched a game since September. But right now I'm hooked, and it's a problem. I guess this just puts me on par with most of the other guys in eng phys though, so it's no excuse. The good news is, I really only need 40% on this exam; the bad news is, I have to be really sure I get 40%, because I'd really be screwing myself over if I didn't. I don't think it should be a problem, but you can never be sure. Well, I guess I should get back to it then, and finally figure out what a Clebsch-Gordon coefficient is.

Music: The Apples in Stereo - Tone Soul Evolution

Physics students are all insomni-nerds

I haven't been to bed before 2 AM since Monday, and it's not looking good for tonight. I just went in to Stirling to hand in my final Laser Optics assignment, due tomorrow morning before Dr. Fraser (yes, it rhymes with "Laser") gets to work. The scary thing was, I was not alone. There were half a dozen people in the building working on stuff, all undergrads, including Dave O. and Nam. They were still working on the assignment I'd just *ahem* finished. I did a half-assed job, as usual. It's not that I'm lazy though, I'm just incredibly apathetic to physics. In high school, it seems like they're always telling you you should be a well-rounded person; once you get to university though, it's apparent that the people who do well are the biggest geeks. Not to say that they aren't cool--being a physics geek, or an art history geek, or a neuroscience geek is cool, if that's what you're into. I know people like that and I admire their passion. But I've realized that the things I'm into are not physics. In fact, they never were. Before I went and devoted my life to it, I'd never cared much for the subject. I still don't. I was good at it, that's all. But, I mean, you should be doing something at school or at work that you'd like to be doing anyway, and for me, physics isn't it. I don't read books about physics if I can avoid it. I read books about politics and history, I listen to music, I'm fascinated by philosophy and cognitive science...but when it comes to engineering and physical sciences, I feel like leaving it up to someone else.

Music: Lift to Experience - The Texas-Jerusalem Crossroads

Rouladen!

Yesterday was what I am promising myself will be the last social event I attend until I finish exams: Rouladenfest 2004. After listening to Alicia go on for three months about how great her traditional German rouladen was, Tim and Ian finally got her to come over and make it for everyone. Rouladen, in case you don't know, is basically bacon, parsley and onions wrapped in beef and cooked until it's so soft you can cut through it with the side of your fork. And yes, it's as good as it sounds. Alicia did another fantastic job of cooking for 15-odd people. The German food was, of course, accompanied by German wine and beer. By about 11:30, we'd all had enough of the German theme (and of watching Family Guy DVDs), so we headed out to the Tir Nan Og Irish Pub for awhile. As usual, there was a live band playing a mix of east coast folk tunes and 90's radio songs, but for the first time ever they failed to play the obligatory bad Beatles cover. I'm guessing they probably didn't read the fine print on their contract.

Happy Christamukah, one and all!

Last night was the second (and probably last) annual Christamukah party over at the girls' place. 17 people, 23 bottles of wine, turkey, ham and all the trimmings. The food was incredible; the dinner was done to perfection (despite--or perhaps because of--some intense last minute stressing on the part of Chantelle) and the appetizers were amazing. We also had a gift exchange, which unfortunately devolved into a drunken orgy of gift-stealing. I ended up with possibly the most inappropriate gift there, courtesy of Craig; I'll post a picture when I get around to retrieving it from the girls' house. Chantelle got my gift, appropriately: it was a piggy bank that said "Shoe Fund" on the side. The hot gift of the night, though, was the set of Sex Dice that Andy brought. I finally got around to giving Sharone the mix CD I made for him a month ago; we put it on at one point and he really liked it (or maybe he was just drunk). It seems my mix CDs have gotten more and more popular since the first one I made for Joel during study week last December.

Birthday shout-outs: Tracey (today), Seanny V.L. (yesterday) and Sherman (Thursday)

Music: Songs: Ohia - Magnolia Electric Co.

How caffeine and my iPod saved the day

It feels like the last three days have been one big, long day. I went from the mess of getting my thesis presentation ready, to writing up my last ever lab report (which I handed in at 4 pm yesterday) to studying for and writing my A.I. exam with a great deal of help from everybody's favorite chemical compound, 3,7-Dihydro-1,3,7-trimethyl-1H-purine-2,6-dione. I have a large collection of "dead" cans of Diet Pepsi on the bookshelf just outside my room. I know it's bad for me, but I think it's better to live life thin and die early of aspartame-induced cancer than to live life fat and die early of fat-induced cancer. I panicked last night at about 10 pm when the power went out. Visions danced through my head of me burning down the house while trying to study by candlelight. Fortunately it came back on in about ten minutes. According to Joel though, the power went off again in the middle of the night and screwed up everone's alarm clocks. That might have been a problem for my 9:30 exam, especially after three nights of sleep deprivation. Luckily I don't use a conventional alarm clock; I use the alarm clock on my iPod, run through a couple of really crappy little speakers. So not only did I wake up on time, I also woke up to some much cooler tunes than you'll ever hear on K-Rock.

The other news is that the holiday season is officially upon us: classes are over, there's tons of snow all of a sudden, and the second annual 301 University Christamukah Party is tonight. It should be fun; everyone who is anyone is going to be there. It's invitation only though, so I guess I'm implying that if you didn't get invited, you're a nobody.

Last Lab Ever

Lousy 3-omega thermal measurements! I have spent 8 hours tonight understanding your theory and analyzing your data! And I still have many hours to go, although pretty soon I may just call it a night and finish tomorrow. As demonic as this lab report is, I'm comforted by the fact that this is the last lab report I will ever have to write! It feels a bit like fighting the boss at the end of a video game: he's tougher than any of the guys you've fought so far, but once you defeat him, you know you get to save the princess. Only instead of a princess, there's just a life without lab reports. Quite frankly, I'd rather have a princess. Tomorrow should be interesting, when I'm finishing my lab report that's due at 5:00 and then studying for my A.I. exam on Friday / doing my A.I. assignment that is also due on Friday. Oh well, caffeine will get me through.

Music: Heatmiser - Mic City Sons

Dreaming, and a Reaming

I'm not usually one to remember my dreams, but I did again tonight. It was one of those dreams where somebody does something bad to you, and when you wake up you're mad at them. I won't reveal any names; in the waking world, this person hasn't done me any wrong and she's a wonderful human being. I used to have these kinds of dreams a lot; in high school, being betrayed by my friends was a constant motif in my dreams. I don't know why that should be though, since I can't remember a time when I actually was betrayed by a friend. Maybe it's a suppressed memory.

In other news, I had my preliminary thesis project presentation today. I got absolutely reamed in the question period. I deserved it though. I got reamed on exactly the things I knew I was going to get reamed on. The problem is, I hate physics and I just don't care any more.

150 more days.